I was 52 years old when I came home from a showing of the movie August: Osage County and had my own epiphany moment. I was thinking of family dynamics and secrets. And how the wise witchy old women did actually know all that had happened. They just made choices about what they chose to acknowledge and what they didn’t.
I thought about my own family and our dynamics. Then it hit me like a ton of bricks as I reflected on my own deep dark family secret - “What if she knew all along?”
Doesn’t that turn my world on it’s head? What if she knew! I had to stop and re-examine everything. Why hasn’t she ever asked me why I despise him so much? Why hasn’t she ever asked me why can’t we just get along? It never occurred to me that she didn’t ask the question because she KNEW the answer! How wicked is that?
Does she? I immediately went into turtle mode and scoffed. I liked my flight of fancy because it showed I still had some imagination left. Or did it? Was it my subconscious driving up from the deep to drop a pearl of crap on the sandy beach? Did I know she knew somehow? And was finally ready to acknowledge it? Today of all days? Decades later? Could I really be that oblivious?
Well why the hell not? I’ve certainly thought she was that oblivious all these years. Why couldn’t it be me instead?
It just reinforces what I know but fail to respect - there are two or more perspectives to every single story. I’ve been living with mine and only mine, never considering another might exist. Seeing things as I saw them in my area of the spotlight without seeing the rest of the stage or back stage.
What a moment in my life when I was reminded I don’t know it all.
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