I've often read in novels about people who are cold or empty or unfeeling. The characters always seemed a bit unreal to me, and if not extremely well written I would be aware that the author was trying to manipulate my feelings about that character.
Today I realized I am one of those characters. I was visiting the house of a dear recently deceased friend to attend the sale of her belongings. I went with a couple of friends. Who both told me as we walked thru the house how much it upset them to see her stuff "like this".
"Doesn't it bother you?" they asked? No, it didn't. Not a bit. I approached it like any other estate sale I might go to, looking for the best buy or an item I just really really needed in my house. I thought it was a bit strange that it bothered my friends, but chalked it up to an excessive amount of feelings. One friend especially can cry over a bug being stepped on. I don't begrudge her that and have always respected her tender feelings. Its just not me.
After further introspection this evening, I'm realizing I probably should care a bit more. I probably should feel more sadness at a minimum for a life well lived cut too short. And that's when I recognized the me of two years ago would have been much more emotional over this. I would still be mourning her loss, instead of feeling the nothingness and absence of caring.
Love's left me.
Aug 22, 2012
Aug 21, 2012
A Day of Firsts
So close to a major milestone birthday, and still getting to experience "first time ever" events. How about that! Life's a ride, that's for sure.
Today social media provided me my new experiences. My daughter unfriended me on Facebook, and I made new professional friends on my very first podcast interview which was conducted using Skype! Social media brought me forward a few steps in my career, and took me backwards a few steps in my personal life. One's about connecting, one's about ego. Both are about relationships. Breaking and bonding. How many people are learning that social media tools are frighteningly awesome and nightmarishly freaky?
How many are learning how quickly idle comments dropped off haphazardly cause irreparable damage? How many are going hat in hand to make amends? How many are getting opportunities never before imagined as the barriers of miles and languages become invisible?
How easy it is to be mean or inconsiderate - I can start a chain of hate mail in 144 characters or less. How enabling it is to be kind and caring - I can reach out around the world and get instant information on how I can help any cause or disaster.
For the most part I've chosen to sit back and watch this new media develop, observing from the sidelines. I am finding more and more that's not possible. I say it's manageable, don't participate, tune out if you want, don't log in, hit back or next. Its sucking me in anyways. Is that our future, all of us? Whether we want it or not?
Today social media provided me my new experiences. My daughter unfriended me on Facebook, and I made new professional friends on my very first podcast interview which was conducted using Skype! Social media brought me forward a few steps in my career, and took me backwards a few steps in my personal life. One's about connecting, one's about ego. Both are about relationships. Breaking and bonding. How many people are learning that social media tools are frighteningly awesome and nightmarishly freaky?
How many are learning how quickly idle comments dropped off haphazardly cause irreparable damage? How many are going hat in hand to make amends? How many are getting opportunities never before imagined as the barriers of miles and languages become invisible?
How easy it is to be mean or inconsiderate - I can start a chain of hate mail in 144 characters or less. How enabling it is to be kind and caring - I can reach out around the world and get instant information on how I can help any cause or disaster.
For the most part I've chosen to sit back and watch this new media develop, observing from the sidelines. I am finding more and more that's not possible. I say it's manageable, don't participate, tune out if you want, don't log in, hit back or next. Its sucking me in anyways. Is that our future, all of us? Whether we want it or not?
Posted with BlogsyAug 17, 2012
More of my 401k for sale
My Harry Potter collection. I truly didn't mind a bit putting this one for sale. I don't want it, but doesn't appear anyone else does, either!!
Subway....
The place you come when nobody wants to go to lunch with you. I see a lot of singles in here!
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